Why Men Wait Too Long to Ask for Help — And Why They Don’t Have To

For many men, asking for help can feel uncomfortable.

Not because they do not want support.

Because somewhere along the way they learned that they should be able to handle it themselves.

Get on with it.

Keep going.

Stay strong.

Carry it.

So they do.

The Transition Happened Before the Transition Happened

We often think transitions begin when something changes.

A baby is born.

A wedding takes place.

We retire.

We move house.

We receive a diagnosis.

We attend a funeral.

We imagine there is a moment when one chapter ends and another begins.

The Doctor Said "Stress and Anxiety." Now What?

You finally made the appointment.

You sat in the waiting room.

You answered the questions.

You told the GP enough for them to understand that things haven't been right for a while.

Eventually they said the words:

"Stress and anxiety."

I'm Not Depressed. So Why Does Everything Feel Flat?

You wouldn't describe yourself as depressed.

At least not in the way people usually talk about depression.

You still get up.

You still go to work.

You still do what needs doing.

From the outside, life carries on much as it always has.

Functioning on the Outside, Disconnected on the Inside

From the outside, everything looks fine.

You go to work.

You pay the bills.

You remember the birthdays.

You sort the school run.

You answer messages.

You keep things moving.

Why Do I Sit in the Car for Five Minutes Before Going Inside?

You pull onto the drive.

The headlights catch the front door.

You turn off the engine.

And then you sit there.

Not because you're avoiding your family.

Not because you don't want to go inside.

You just need a minute.

Me In Time: The Space Between Us

There is one argument that Claire and I will probably still be having when we are both ninety.

Who came up with the name Me In Time.

I maintain that it was me. I can remember drawing a clock because I thought it was about time. In my mind, this is fairly compelling evidence.

Claire maintains that she came up with it after a glass of red wine, because she is convinced she becomes more creative after a glass of red wine.

The truth is, neither of us can prove it.