Why I Waited Before Joining a Therapy Directory
There seems to be an assumption that as soon as you qualify, you should immediately join every counselling directory you can find.
It's easy to understand why.
You've spent years training. You've finally qualified. You've opened your private practice, and naturally you want people to find you.
I nearly did exactly the same.
But I waited.
Not because I didn't believe in directories. Quite the opposite. I always knew I would join them. I simply wasn't convinced I was ready.
Looking back, I'm glad I waited.
I Didn't Yet Know What I Wanted To Say
When I first qualified, I could tell people what qualifications I had and which theoretical approaches I used.
What I couldn't yet explain was who I really worked with.
If someone had asked me,
"What makes you different?"
I'm not sure I could have answered.
I hadn't yet found my voice.
Building A Practice Before Promoting One
Over the following months, something changed.
I wasn't trying to create a niche.
I was paying attention to the work I found myself doing.
The conversations I enjoyed.
The people I naturally connected with.
The themes that kept appearing.
Gradually, the picture became clearer.
Men.
Fathers.
Grief.
Neurodivergence.
Life transitions.
Not because I had decided those would be my niche, but because they were the conversations I kept returning to.
The Website Helped Me Understand My Own Practice
Building my website probably taught me as much about my practice as any marketing course could have.
Every page forced me to answer questions I hadn't really considered before.
Who am I writing for?
What do I actually believe about therapy?
How do I describe my work without sounding like everyone else?
What do I want someone to feel when they land on my website?
Writing article after article slowly gave me answers.
I realised I wasn't trying to persuade people to come to therapy.
I was trying to help them recognise themselves.
Confidence Came Afterwards
Something else happened that surprised me.
The more I wrote, the easier it became to describe what I did.
Not because I became better at marketing.
Because I became clearer about my own practice.
Eventually I reached the point where writing my Psychology Today profile felt straightforward.
I wasn't trying to invent a version of myself that sounded impressive.
I was simply describing the practice that already existed.
Directories Don't Create Your Identity
Joining a directory isn't what gives you a professional identity.
It simply makes your existing identity easier for people to find.
If your website says one thing...
Your directory profile says another...
And your articles sound like somebody else entirely...
People notice.
Consistency creates confidence.
Would I Still Wait?
Probably.
Not because everyone should.
Some therapists are completely clear about who they are from the day they qualify.
Others, like me, discover it through doing the work.
There's no right answer.
For me, waiting meant that when I finally joined a directory, I wasn't trying to become the therapist I hoped to be.
I was describing the therapist I had gradually become.
Since publishing this article...
I'm pleased to share that I've now joined Psychology Today. Rather than creating a profile first and working out my identity afterwards, I wanted it to reflect the practice I'd gradually built—working with men, fathers, grief and bereavement, neurodivergence, and life's difficult transitions.
